It started with what seemed like a good idea at the time ‘Come over for the weekend, stay at mine’ harmless words, what could go wrong.
In a normal relationship with a girl within driving distance, it is normal to be seeing each others houses in small doses. A living room here and there, a kitchen for an hour and so on. But in a long distance relationship it all changes. Suddenly there was a girl that had never stepped foot in my home before that was going to be spending a long weekend and have time to see every detail, every crack, and every unpainted skirting board.
Then I remembered an old advert from the 80’s with the tag line……. ‘You never get a second chance to make a first impression’ GULP!
So what do you do when you suddenly start to notice all the little things in your house that might not give such a good impression???? BLONDE PANIC!!!!
After the initial panic settled down and I started to think rationally, and repainting the whole house not really being an option, my thoughts turned to coming up with a plan. Part of that plan was going to involve food. Desert was sorted. My cooking skills may be average, but I make a cheesecake from another dimension. Based around a childhood memory of my Nan’s cheesecakes, and a lot of mistakes in the kitchen perfecting it.
Meanwhile, a blog I had been following for a while The Urban Potato Eater was talking about romantic food and even ideas for dates. The blog follows the experiences of a trainee chef and had given me some great ideas. Things were starting to take shape at last.
Now I had my plan. The house was OK but in no way perfect, so all I had to do was keep her distracted with an old photo album or two, some good music, great conversation and food.
With everything in place there was one thing I was not taking into consideration, well three things if I am honest: My pets. You see. you can explain to friends and family that you are having a romantic weekend, but pets……. The jealous dog, it seems, was the least of my problems though. Even if he was watching us every time we got close to each other. But the cats…. oh no the cats……
What I had forgotten to mention the night before is that I have a cat that likes toes, especially toes that escape the bed clothes early in the morning. 5am and out of nowhere, an exploratory single claw attached itself onto the new and interesting big toe of the French foot, she hit the roof with a YELP!!!!. Good morning dear! just didn’t seem fitting. Of course the same thing happened the next morning too.
There really is very little you can do about pets. I guess the good part about the distractions from pets was that my tired house guest was a lot more interested in them, than any cobwebs in dark corners I may have missed. And maybe next time she will learn to sleep with her feet under the covers. But I doubt it.